Previously on Fox’s Scoobies, the Vampire Cajolers:

Giles: “It says here that the end of the world is nigh.  We have to obtain the hat of McBealanara, bless it with the spell of  Simpsonian, then find the Sculder demon and kill it before it sucks us all back into the 70’s.  Are you all with me?”

Xander:  “You know I’m in, oh King of Tweed.”

Anya: “Oh!  Me too.  Wherever Xander’s body goes, I follow.  Right sweety?”

Anya winks at Xander while he pretends that his girlfriend is not doing that in public again, despite many heated discussions about the subject.

Willow: “I’m still working on the Spell of Simpsonian, but I am getting much closer.”

Tara: “A-a-and I-I’ll just hel…hel…hel…P Willow.  I-If that’s a-alright with you, Mr. G-G-Giles.”

Giles:  “Yes, of course.”

Giles takes off his glasses and begins cleaning them with his handkerchief in an attempt to ignore Willow’s right hand going up Tara’s skirt, which is making her stutter even worse than normal.

Giles:  “Well, I say.  Where is that scoundrel Spike when you really need him?”

Xander:  “Oh.  I forgot to tell you.  Neutered boy is busy this week.  He got picked for a new Fox game show: ‘Who wants to kill a millionaire’.  We should be able to get along fine without him, though.  When does he ever help more than hinder, anyhow?”

Giles: “Yes, quite.  Well, then that just leaves Buf…”

A Fox executive with wild, green hair, a white face, and a black and white striped suit bursts out from the weapons closet.  With a finger up to his lips, he utters:

Fox Exec: “Eh, eh, eh.  Nobody says the ‘B’ word.”

With that, he disappears as quickly as he appeared.

Giles: “Quite.  Well, let’s do it people.”

Just then, a figure kicks open the door to the Magic Box.  It stands in the doorway, hands on its hips, silent.

Tara: “Angel?!”

Figure: “Yes!  I am Max Guevara, better known as ‘Dark Angel’.”

All: “Wrong Angel!”

Heads down with slight defeat, the Scooby gang gathers up its knowledge and weapons, and heads toward the next apocalypse.

Hours later at the Magic Box:

Ethan Rayne: “I knew those bloody children did not have a chance.  Ha, haahahahahahha!  Nice shoppe though.  I think I’ll keep it.”

Once again, the door bursts open and a pale figure in a long, black leather coat enters the shoppe.  Blood is dripping down his face from his large, sinister smile.  He is in all game face.

Ethan: "I take it you won, old boy."

Spike: “Did you have any doubts?  They never do very thorough background checks."  (Spike snickers.)  "So, what’s this, eh?  The Scooby’s on vacation?”
 

Ethan: “Nope.  Apocalypse.  The poor souls died the second the demon showed its face.  It’s not like they had the help of a Slay…”

The same Fox executive with wild, green hair, a white face, and a black and white striped suit bursts out from the weapons closet again.  With a finger up to his lips, he utters:

Fox Exec: “Eh, eh, eh.  Nobody says the ‘S’ word.”

With that, he disappears as quickly as he came.

Ethan just laughs but Spike gets angrier and angrier by the second.

James (in a decidedly Californian accent): “Hey now!  This is just plain stupid.  Who’s dumb ass idea was this in the first place?!  Move a top rated show with a loyal audience to another network, AND fail to bring along the stars!  That’s it.  I’m out of here.”

Muttering something about Shakespeare in the park,  James sheds the studio’s leather duster, tears off his latex vampire face and storms off the set.  As he slams the door of the Magic Box set behind him, all the walls in the set quake.

Director: “CUT!”

The director bows his head and holds it with his hands.

Director: “Somehow, this has got to be all Fury’s fault.”
 

END